Delicious awakening. The best waking up I've ever had was when I was crossing the Atlantic Ocean on a sailboat. I'd never experienced anything like it before. I think I analyzed it this way: I became conscious BEFORE I actually woke up, so I could in a sense watch myself moving from sleep to wakefulness. It felt a little like emerging from a tunnel or swimming, yes, it was very like swimming up from the bottom of the pool. I would break the surface...and then I'd be awake. I never get that now that I'm back on land, so it might have to do with the rocking of the boat. I don't know but it definitely puts a glorious horizon on your day.

This morning, before I heard the rain, I lay there just letting my mind roam pleasurably over the various things I could do upon getting out of bed. Yoga, definitely yoga. But then, what? Vaccum? Maybe some cooking? I just imagined the various things that crossed my mind. I have nothing on the calendar.

I had this sensation of a wide day in front of me, and realized that I have rarely felt that this year. My experience has been that I'm never able just to think lazily about what I might want to do, that I have plans, and when I don't have plans, I have chores. The weekends seem crammed full of laundry and cleaning and doing the family finances and taking care of critical paperwork. It FEELS as if I don't have any time. Of course, we know that's false. We all have time, and we have the power to choose what we do with that time.

One of my LJ friends talked yesterday about seeing time and the things to do moving towards her rather than her moving along the time line. Now that I'm trying to articulate it, I'm not doing such a good job. But while her picture feels too passive to me, not empowered enough, it does get at the pleasure that comes when I'm still, and imagining moving, the moment before the decision to act. Maybe that's why it is so yummy. It's like being conscious before I'm awake.